What success looks like if you're a disabled freelancer

The Two Realms

Have you seen the movie, The Others starring Nicole Kidman?

[Spoiler Alert] Being disabled feels like being in the ghost realm, where you are invisible to the living world, which suspects you exist, but doesn't really see you or understand you. And you have your own world with different rules for how things work.

I wanted to write about how success feels to me, which does not align with the conventional material world definition of "success."

Being Good Enough

No matter how good you are, when your body or mind works differently from the "norm," you have to work twice as hard just to be taken seriously.

Whether it’s invisible pain, fatigue that won’t quit, or mobility limits that others don’t understand, we often live in a world where we’re either underestimated or expected to perform like nothing’s different. The knee-jerk reaction of the world is to view disabled freelancers as less efficient or inadequate.

In reality, being disabled, we need to have an inner strength that others don't often need to develop.

Disability teaches you things no training course can. It forces you to become extra resourceful. You have to know how to plan ahead, adjust on the fly, and build systems that work even when your body doesn’t cooperate.

You learn to budget your energy the way others budget money. This is called pacing, which is doing tasks in small chunks, taking planned breaks, and avoiding the trap of “pushing through.” When you push yourself too far, like go out on consecutive days, cook a lot the day you also shampooed your hair, or travel, you crash.

Pacing and crashing are inevitable and regular components of a life with chronic illness.

Many disabled folks use spoon theory to describe this: imagining you start each day with a limited number of energy tokens (or “spoons”), and each task, no matter how small, costs one. When the spoons are gone, they’re gone, and managing your day becomes a matter of strategic survival. And as people with chronic illness know, every activity requires spoons. From showering to brushing your hair, from cooking to watering the plants, you need to pay with your precious spoons.

My Journey of Finding Balance

I have developed ways of working that balance quality and sustainability. This includes planning tasks around good and bad days, using tools to make things easier or automated, and setting honest boundaries with clients.

Balance might mean doing focused work in short bursts or having backup plans for everything. I have some really cool productivity systems and organizational approaches that I think even able-bodied people could benefit from!

To be successful and well-adjusted in your disabled life, you need to learn to listen to your body. In the process, you learn to listen to others and to the silences.

You learn patience, empathy, and problem-solving, not from books or YouTube channels, but from lived experience. And when you bring all that into your work, you offer a different kind of compassionate professionalism.

My innate personality is the kind that does not make me seek constant visibility or big claims in terms of quantity. But with disability and illness, even I have needed to redefine what success looks like. I value being consistent in my own way, delivering value on my terms, and being proud of the life I’ve carved out despite — or maybe because of — the obstacles.

As much as I love lists, success is no longer about checking off a long to-do list or landing ten clients a month. In the early days, I couldn't even meet the revenue milestones every month.

Success now looks like showing up for client work even when the times are tough. It means setting limits without guilt, scheduling breaks before burnout, and delivering high-quality work without sacrificing my health.

For someone else, success might be managing to work just a few hours a week while living with severe fatigue or sensory overload. For another, it might be building a low-pressure income stream while managing your mental health challenges.

Ditch Societal Definitions, Define Personal Success

The definition changes — but what stays constant is that success, for disabled freelancers, is deeply personal.

You cannot be "productive" by the able-world's standards. And as a disabled freelancer, you cannot use the metrics of the hustle culture of able-bodied freelancers. But you can create a work life that honors your body, your pace, and your truth.

Disability is not the opposite of ability. It’s a different kind of expertise. One that the working world needs to respect, include, and learn from. So let go of one-size-fits-all success formulas. Define what success means for you. And build a life that works with you — not against you.